The Minnesota Love Boat and other Sinking NFL Ships

By Ivette Ricco

The Love Boat – it’s Exciting and New
The Love Boat – come aboard we’re expecting you!
The Love Boat – we’ve got lap dances too.

There was the Whizzinator flap, and there was the Mike Tice scalping incident, and now there’s the Love Boat orgy.

I tell ya, it not so bad being a 49ers fan when you consider the alternative might be to live in frigid weather and have to put up with a chronically underachieving team that seems to be constantly embroiled in a series of unfortunate events.

Even the 49ers video scandal pales in comparison.

When your team can’t score points or stop anybody it seems the ideal time to get on a chartered boat and set sail for the high seas. But the Vikings set sail on a cruise destined for more than just a little R&R. This little party may have tolled the final bell on the Mike Tice Vikings.

Oh how that Vikings ship is sinking.

This is a team in need of leadership, without it, I’m sorry to say they are totally lost.
When your team leader sells Super Bowl tickets to make a few extra bucks you have to wonder who sets the morale standards. Not setting the bar too high are you Mike?

New owner Zygi Wilf looks like a deer caught in the headlights. If I ponied up millions of dollars for a losing team I at least would have liked an invitation to the party!
Poor Wilf, all he needs is a cigar in his hand and he could do a Groucho Marx shtick.

 

SOS
I don’t like to “pile on” but this team was picked by the so-called experts to make it to the playoffs, and strangely enough there’s still that possibility considering the weak NFC North where the Lions are in first place at 2-3.
But wholesale changes need to be made, and there is no better place to start than at the top, with the coach. In every business entity the head guy or gal is held accountable, right or wrong.

It’s time for the Mike Tice era to end.

 

Speaking of sinking ships-

 

San Diego 27 Raiders 14

How ‘bout them Raiders? They were hit by lightning in their “house”, again.
Can you believe that this team is now 1-4 and getting pushed around at home?

What happened to the points they were going to score with LaMont Jordan and Randy “Kiss my ass” Moss? Where is Warren Sapp and the improved defense hiding, at Janikowski’s house?
The Bolts are in great position in their division and sitting pretty with a healthy Drew Brees and LaDamian Tomlinson. Not too bad especially when you consider they have Philip Rivers sitting on the bench, ain’t nothing but a party in San Diego.

 

Houston 10 Seattle 42

The Texans are still winless everywhere, including in Seattle. David Carr is getting mangled weekly. The Seahawks feasted on Texas meat and bones and it was so ugly I had to turn away.

I think the Texans are looking towards the 2006 season and number the one pick in the draft. How would Matt Leinart look in a Texans uniform?

 

Atlanta 34 Saints 31

Not a thing I can say about the fate of the Saints. The Saints keep trying to valiantly come marching in but they seem destined to fight an uphill battle and keep limping out.
The Falcons best keep Michael Vick in the pocket more or they will shorten his young career.

 

Minnesota 3 Bears 28

Enough said.

 

Cincinnati 31 Titans 23

The Titans put up a great fight and very nearly pulled off the upset. But the Bengals have been sprinkled with fairy dust and are getting fitted for their silver slippers as we speak.

Jacksonville 23 Pittsburgh 17

The Steelers were without Big Ben and Hines Ward but still could rely on its defense.
Tommy Maddox looked pretty rusty but the Steelers hung in til the end. The Jags got a big boost from their defense to win this contest in OT.

 

Washington 21 Chiefs 28

Another tight ball game. The Chiefs can’t afford a let down with the Broncos and the Chargers playing very well in the AFC West. As Mark Brunnel goes so will the Redskins.

Carolina 21 Lions 20
Another fantastic finish but not so fantastic for the Lions.

 

Browns 3 Ravens 16
Romeo Crennel’s Browns didn’t fare much better than Romeo’s former employer, the Pats, both teams going down in defeat. Anthony Wright isn’t the long-term solution for the Ravens but at least they finally scored some points.

Dolphins 13 Bucs 27
Talented running backs were everywhere on the field of play in Florida. But Ricky Williams’ return after his four game suspension didn’t make a bit of difference for the Fish as the Bucs put another W in the books.

NY Giants 13 Cowboys 16
A wild and messy game. It looked more like a flag football game than a professional football game with the obscene number of penalties called.
In the end the G-Men lost but not without a valiant effort by the Giants defense.

NY Jets 17 Bills 27

Looks like the Bills have found their quarterback in Kelly Holcomb.

Patriots 20 Broncos 28
This looked like a blowout in the first half but the Champion Patriots are always dangerous. Tom Brady engineered a comeback from a 25-point deficit that almost…but not quite delivered another fabulous finish.

Rams 28 at Colts 45

I left the house just as this game kicked off thinking, ho hum, this should be a blowout.

I came back just as the first quarter ended and saw a 17 and an 0 on the screen and thought, wow, Manning has put up 17 points already? And then I stopped in my tracks; it was 17 Rams, Colts 0.
Needless to say I sat right down and didn’t budge until the Colts were cruising in the fourth quarter 38-20.

The Colts took complete control of the game, knocked Marc Bulger out in the process, and showed they had the stamina to fight back from a huge deficit.

It was interesting to see Manning yelling at his offensive linemen. Manning is the obvious leader of this team and it showed, sometimes in not a less than flattering way.

He argues calls and even places himself in the officials’ huddles. There aren’t many players with that kind of clout.

The end result? An impressive come from behind win and a 6-0 record.

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