Don’t Phunk With My Heart..or how to justify a good cry during football season
By Ivette Ricco
November 28, 2005
Do you feel my pain? Are you weary, wounded and bloodied by the play of your team this season? Is the team of your choice, the object of your affection and the reason you get up every Sunday phunking with your heart?
Have you kept your chin up, hopes high and continued to believe?
Only to discover time and again that your “boys” are simply ugly to the core?
Think you’ve got it bad?
Think your season couldn’t possibly get worse?
Think you have good reason to cry?
My friend, you are not alone.
(Hum to the melody of Johnny Ray’s “Cry” – if you don’t know the song and under 50 years of age, you’re still a baby, so go ahead and turn on your IPOD and listen to the Black Eyed Peas, Don’t Phunk With My Heart)
If your team sends a message of goodbye
It's no secret you'll feel better if you cry
When waking from a bad dream
Don't you sometimes think it's real?
But it's only false emotions that you feel
If your heartaches seem to hang around too long
And your blues keep getting bluer with each loss
Remember sunshine can be found behind a cloudy sky
So let your hair down and go on and cry
Crying Time
Houston oh Houston, you had a 20 point lead and were on the verge of a huge upset and a significant second win and then….you blew it
You deserve a big cry…sniff
G-Men, you fought the good fight but your kicker missed three crucial field goals, oh my Feely blue today, gone tomorrow.
Get the big blue hanky out
D.C. you thought you had the bolts contained and then POW as quick as you can say LT, you were on your way to a painful home loss
We feel your pain
Raiders, you were blacked out locally, and that was the good news. You also lost Sapp for the season and all playoff hopes when the rebuilding fish fried you, in your own house for crying out loud!
That deserves a big sloppy sappy sob
Tampa you refused to believe that the Bears were really that good. And now you know, they are all that!
Go ahead and let out a primal scream
Cheeseheads and other Packer fans, have you admitted yet that the Pack is packing it in?
Brett is tossing as many picks as touchdowns and who can blame him when he has to play the game all alone.
Go on, weep, but keep the cheese dry
Niners, you thought you had met your offensive peer, the tumbling Titans. But after a hopeful start to a game with the score 14-9 halftime lead you had to go and shoot yourself in the foot and lose ugly on the road to the forgettable titans. But, no, you gave the game away in the second half as you changed identities yet again.
I’m all out of Kleenex and my tear ducts are dry from crying for you this season
Detroit, you looked completely lost this week and were the biggest Turkey on Thanksgiving. Guess what? Mooch is gone and Millen is still calling the shots.
You get to have a really long, long, cry
Week 12 Moments
Da Bears, are winning in the old school way.
Defense. Keep the offense from scoring and you win games.
The surprising Bears have the NFL’s number one defense and with that they have now won seven games in a row. On Sunday they only needed some offensive efficiency and a little good fortune to upend the Bucs 13-10.
A true playoff type of game was played on Sunday between two of the best NFC teams in the league. The G-Men coulda, shoulda, won this one, but Jay Feely missed three field goals and three shots at a win and the Seahawks survived to go on and win this game 24 to 21 in OT. I expect to see these two teams again in the playoffs.
LT is the “man”. The Chargers dominant running back put on another display on Sunday as the Chargers won over the Redskins 23-17 in overtime, which included a 42-yard run by LT.
New England’s Tom Brady was uncharacteristically “imperfect” in this game with four interceptions.
The Chiefs controlled the game with the running of Larry Johnson to beat the Pats 26-16.
I n another unlikely scenario, and a heartbreaking end for the Texans, the Rams came from behind with third string quarterback Ryan Fitzpatrick to beat the tragic Texans 33-27 in OT.
Daunte Culpepper’s season ended and the Vikings season started. With Brad Johnson under center and a reenergized defense the Vikings are making a bid for the playoffs beating the Browns 24-12.
The Ravens upset the Steelers last week, but….not this week. The Bengals had no problem with the Ravens defense and with a 300-yard game for Carson Palmer and a 100-yard game for Rudi Johnson, the Bengals are putting a lot of pressure on the other AFC teams to stay in control as they took down the Ravens 42-29.
The Panthers got back on track this week as they assumed sole possession of the NFC South with a 13-9 victory over the Buffalo Bills.
The Jags won the game but lost their quarterback. With Byron Leftwich out with a broken ankle, David Garrard took the field for the Jags and led them to a 24-17 win over a competitive Cardinals team.
The Raiders gave their fans a reason for hope last week when they beat the Redskins, on the road. Coming home to their house and taking on the floundering fish seemed like just the ticket to get them moving back up the food chain. But no, they underachieved once again to lose ugly and give the Dolphins a road victory with a final score of 33-21.
Didn’t we bury the Eagles last week? I guess they didn’t get the memo as they ran the ball for 180 yards. The Packers ran well also but couldn’t overcome their mistakes in a 19-14 win for the Eagles.
If a team needs to get better and reverse its losing fortunes all they need to do is play the 49ers. The Titans have been really terrible this season as they go through a rebuilding phase. The old Steve McNair made an appearance in this game as he threw for 343 yards and 3 touchdowns. The Niners had a shot in this game but the mistakes by Kwame Harris and Otis Amey doomed them once again in a 33-22 win for the Titans.
The Monday Night Game featured two AFC heavyweight contenders, the undefeated Indianapolis Colts vs. the Pittsburgh Steelers. Big Ben was back after missing three games with a knee injury. Too bad his comeback was against the red hot Colts. The Colts took control of the game early in the first half and never let up. The Colts are now 11-0 and poised to make history. Will Tony Dungy clinch and play it safe for the rest of the season or try and make history with a 16-0 record? Time will tell, for tonight at least they were operating on all cylinders as they beat the Steelers 26-7.
Week Twelve Fearless Picks Record 12-4
Season Record 111-65
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